Two suns before tomorrow's rise
Imagination could disguise
Your head and mine, yet never lie
Because the make-believes were free to tame
Two moons from yesterday's appeal
Our shrouds will fail to keep concealed
Benighted cheeks to turn and steal
Away like bedlamites with craven names
Two earths remain until the skies
Allow us room to overfly
Then with a twinkle, with a sigh,
Extended palms will stroke the world reclaimed














Comments
and I think its a good thing that you followed where this took you, rather than making it strictly about childhood.
all around, 10/10 : )
It's technically about regret and longing for childhood, but hoping that childhood can somehow be found again.
I actually don't think it's my best work, because it came out really fast like, um, word vomit. haha. Maybe some editing could be used... oh, but I don't hate it or anything!
like you said, its still good,
maybe if you feel bored one day you can go back and work on it
either way, i think its good for being thought up in such sort amount of time.
thanks so much
I adore the opening lines of each stanza like nobody's business.
--
Give Peace a Chance.
Two more faves? My work now makes up 1/28th of your favorites!
I actually sat here and figured that out... did you seriously count my favorites, and then count how many of my favorites were yours and then do the math (as I just did) or did you have some magical shortcut?
Or was that just a really freaky guess?
--
Give Peace a Chance.
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